We Can't Forget the Siblings

Today's post is a little different because it doesn't have much to do with my autistic son.  He was in bed at the time.  Nope, it is about his little brother.  We CANNOT forget these beautiful siblings of special needs children.

Last night, I had a few of my childhood friends over to catch up.  I thought the evening was going to be just what I needed, and it was, but what I realized throughout the evening is that it was what my little one needed also.  We don't have a lot of playdates because my son with autism just can't handle the extra noise and commotion of extra bodies in the house.  Don't get me wrong, we do have certain friends who still drop in (one in particular that I can think of) that understand my son as best they can and their kids play around my son.  Not always "with" my son, since he lacks in social skills because of his autism, but he loves to watch them play.

Anyway, during my evening last night, I started watching "baby brother" and his interactions with my friends' kids.  First he was being chased by the little girls and was screaming and laughing in delight, then they were down on all fours roaring and pretending to be all sorts of animals, and then my son and one of his new friends (my friend's little boy who is just about the same age) climbed onto the kitchen chairs and ate bowls of ice cream together.  It was a beautiful sight, all of it.

I need to make sure that I am nurturing his friendships as he grows older and schedule plenty of playdates, even if his older brother just watches.  Maybe, eventually, he will learn to join in and be chased by the girls too!  ;) 

Will I Never Learn?

Really?  Why do I always think that it will be different this time?  That I can live my life anywhere close to what I did before my son came along?  We are still on vacation, and I thought it would be a lot of fun to get out of the condo and take the entire crew (that would be me and 5 kiddos) to the mall.  It's not like the mall was crowded today...it was a school day, and we arrived before lunchtime.  And we weren't really "shopping," just window browsing and stopping off for a treat.  By the time we left the mall with whatever dignity I had left a short time later, the entire mall was cheering with our departure.  Okay, so that may be exaggerating, but just a little bit.  It's days like today that I fantasize about downsizing and finding enough extra money each month to hire a full time nanny, (for trips such as today), and a house keeper.  :)

Final Note:  Please don't think that I don't love my son like crazy!  I do!  Just keep in mind that this is my safe place to vent, and the best therapy that I can afford.  ;)

Here We Go Again!

I have decided to start the newest protocol recommended by my son's DAN! (Defeat Autism Now!) doctor.  I will start very slowly.  I have been hesitant to start anything new because my son is very sensitive to everything, and he's been pretty level lately.  BUT, the past two days have been rough.  Let me start by saying that we are on vacation and, although I've tried to keep his routine close to the same, I'm sure he is feeling the change.  I decided to do something fun for him yesterday and I took him to the aquarium.  He usually LOVES the calming effects of the water and fish, but I forgot to take into account that it is spring break where we are right now and the aquarium was packed with noisy kids.  I should have just turned around to leave, but I was meeting a friend and her kids there, so I thought we would get through.  Uugh...it may have been the worst meltdown yet.  Actually, it was a continuous series of meltdowns.  All of us (my older kids and I) were exhausted by the time we left.  Therefore, it has prompted me to start on the special blend of homeopathics that his doctor sent with us on vacation.  There are other things that we are supposed to add also, but, again, I am going to go s-l-o-w.  Wish us luck!  

While You Were Sleeping

While on vacation last week, I found myself staring at my son while he was sleeping.  And thinking to myself, as I looked at his long eyelashes, his perfect lips, and his tall body, that nobody would know anything was "different" with him if they saw him like this.  It is so easy for a stranger to see him in public and wonder (or sometimes even comment out loud) why he is misbehaving, screaming, or flapping his arms.  He doesn't look different physically than other children his age.  And the truth is, he is a beautiful child of God and has the right to have friends, attention, and people love him because of who he is, not because of what he has.    

Just a Reminder! :)

I returned home from the store yesterday and my son was "helping" me empty the bags.  He found some shirts that I had bought for his big brother and was so excited!  He carried them around for about 20 minutes saying, "Oh, I love them!  I love them!"  Just another reminder to enjoy the simple things.  :)

The What is Where?

My son kept sneezing this morning, over and over, and I thought that he must be getting the cold that I am just getting over.  He finally looked at me and said, "Bean!  Bean!"  He had stuck a dry bean up his left nostril.  Luckily I could see it and got it out easily by running my finger down the outside of his nose.  I just hope it was the only one up there!

Where's the Money Tree?

Since my son's doctor recommended taking him off of all of his medications and supplements and doing more testing, we have pulled him off of everything except for his vitamins.  But they are very strong, and we are down to 1/2 dose per day.  We just haven't decided what testing to do now.  I read an article this morning called, "8 Facts About Autism the Media Is Not Covering" by Holly Robinson Peete.  Number one on her list:  "Autism Is Unaffordable."  It is very hard as the parent of an autistic child to decide just where to spend the money.  Therapy, bio-medical appointments and supplements, equipment???  Nothing, and I mean nothing associated with autism is inexpensive.

I am researching a new therapy called Floortime.  It promises great results, and it is mainly between parent (or sibling, babysitter, etc...) and child.  The question is, do I keep on with more testing and meds, or more occupational therapy, AND add in Floortime?  I was reading a report last night that stated autistic children who get 25 hours of therapy a week see the best results.  25 hours!  A one-hour occupational therapist visit costs $125.00.  We are one of the lucky ones that get some of that cost covered by our insurance after we meet the yearly deductible, but it still adds up fast.  Just a few days ago, I was researching a different therapy called ABA (Applied Behavior Analysis.)  I have even considered buying a DVD training program to learn how to implement this at home.  But everyone claims that their therapy, program, treatment...is the best!  A "can't do-without-solution!"  I understand that there is no cure for autism.  I know that my son will always have his quirks and possibly have very little verbal skills throughout his life.  But I want to give him every chance that I can to lead a wonderful life, no matter what that will mean in his world.  I never want to tell him at age 18 that I gave up on him at age 3.  I will continue to fight.